Don't let me swim in your pools
Don't let me teach in your schools
Don't let me display my affections in public
like all of you slobbering fools
Don't sit beside me at meals
Don't give me insurance deals
Don't convict skinheads who beat up my friends,
and if you do, grant them lots of appeals
Leave all my needs in the lurch
While you argue about me in church
Don't pretend to respect me, but rather subject me
to warped scientific research..
Wrap me in reels of red tape
Declare that my brain's the wrong shape,
Which explains my perversion, this unmanly aversion..
~to stag parties, football, and rape.
But, please...
Let me into the military,
Let me into the military,
I can be strong and reactionary
Why discriminate?
Let me into the military,
I wanna be a mercenary
It's a long way to Tipperary
Take me along as freight!
Don't even admit I exist
Unless you're an Evangelist
I can endure being ignored and obscured
If you'd please please please let me enlist
Don't pass my civil rights bill
Do write me out of your will,
and continue to quarrel about whether I'm moral
enough to maim, slaughter, and kill!
I'll be the model recruit
I'll steady my wrist when I shoot
To save the armed forces some valuable resources
I won't use the camp prostitute.
I'll keep my hair neatly shorn
I'll promise you my firstborn
and if something seems queer, it will not be my spirit
~I'll try to get off on the porn
So, please...
Let me into the military
Let me into the military
I want a glorious obituary,
Just like someone straight
Let me into the military
I wanna augment my vocabulary
with words like “faggot,” “fruit,” and “fairy”
Oh boy, it's gonna be great!
Let me into the military,
Let me into the military,
I mean, come on.
If all these anti-gay-rights amendments get passed,
it's probably about the only job I'm going to be able to get.
Not to mention that the military is, of course,
one of the most openly homoerotic organizations in the US today,
with the possible exception of the advertising industry.
Maybe I could get a job there.
Well, not in Colorado, though.
You know, what my pastor always said about me
was that I just basically lacked discipline.
Don't let me teach in your schools
Don't let me display my affections in public
like all of you slobbering fools
Don't sit beside me at meals
Don't give me insurance deals
Don't convict skinheads who beat up my friends,
and if you do, grant them lots of appeals
Leave all my needs in the lurch
While you argue about me in church
Don't pretend to respect me, but rather subject me
to warped scientific research..
Wrap me in reels of red tape
Declare that my brain's the wrong shape,
Which explains my perversion, this unmanly aversion..
~to stag parties, football, and rape.
But, please...
Let me into the military,
Let me into the military,
I can be strong and reactionary
Why discriminate?
Let me into the military,
I wanna be a mercenary
It's a long way to Tipperary
Take me along as freight!
Don't even admit I exist
Unless you're an Evangelist
I can endure being ignored and obscured
If you'd please please please let me enlist
Don't pass my civil rights bill
Do write me out of your will,
and continue to quarrel about whether I'm moral
enough to maim, slaughter, and kill!
I'll be the model recruit
I'll steady my wrist when I shoot
To save the armed forces some valuable resources
I won't use the camp prostitute.
I'll keep my hair neatly shorn
I'll promise you my firstborn
and if something seems queer, it will not be my spirit
~I'll try to get off on the porn
So, please...
Let me into the military
Let me into the military
I want a glorious obituary,
Just like someone straight
Let me into the military
I wanna augment my vocabulary
with words like “faggot,” “fruit,” and “fairy”
Oh boy, it's gonna be great!
Let me into the military,
Let me into the military,
I mean, come on.
If all these anti-gay-rights amendments get passed,
it's probably about the only job I'm going to be able to get.
Not to mention that the military is, of course,
one of the most openly homoerotic organizations in the US today,
with the possible exception of the advertising industry.
Maybe I could get a job there.
Well, not in Colorado, though.
You know, what my pastor always said about me
was that I just basically lacked discipline.
inviata da giorgio - 21/3/2013 - 13:20
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Lyrics & Music by Rick Burkhardt and Andy Gricevich
Album: The Prince Myshkins'Shiny Round Object