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The Abu Ghraib Hotel

Rachel Stone
Language: English




Welcome to the Abu Ghraib Hotel
We hope that you enjoy your stay here well
Thanks to your hosts, Rumsfeld, Bush and Cheney
You’re our free guest as a war detainee

Whether or not
You’re feeling hot
We’ll take your clothes away
You’ll feel at ease
Down on your knees
And with our soldiers you’ll play all day

Don’t worry about your children
Don’t worry about your wife
With Private Lynndi England
You’ll get a whole new leash on life

…Welcome to the Abu Ghraib Hotel!

You’ll be pleased to know you’ll play a part
In our human high performance art
You’ll emulate the ancient pyramids
Playing Johnny-on-the-Pony
Like a bunch of college kids

If you feel disgraced
Want to hide your face
This is how you could:
Stand naked and randy
Sniffing panties
From Fredericks of Hollywood!

…Welcome to the Abu Ghraib Hotel!

We’ve got this great new gadget in the gym
To see how you good you are at balancing
You stand up on a box, all fully wired
Extend your arms, and hope you don’t get tired
And to make it good
We throw on a hood
As we laugh and scoff
Although it’s tough
Don’t sneeze or cough
‘Cause it could be shocking if you fall off

If told “bark like a dog”
You’d better go “bow-wow”
Or our snarling (ahem) darling pooches
Will have to show you how… (ow!)

Don’t be upset about the humiliation
Think of it as an S&M vacation
It’s all part of our rebuilding your nation
All we need from you… is a little information!

…Welcome to the Abu Ghraib Hotel

And if we play too rough
You’ve had enough
Then we’ll be oh so nice
We’ll gently drag
You into a body bag
And cover you with some soothing ice

We’ll bandage up your battered bleeding head
And then in the morning when you’re dead
We’ll carry you out on a stretcher
Shove a fake I-V in your arm
So the world can see we mean no harm!

…Welcome to the Abu Ghraib Hotel

Though in here we think it’s fun and games
Outside, Iraqis don’t see it the same
And though apologies have all been said
More and more good men have lost their heads!

Yes, welcome to the Abu Ghraib
Don’t think that we’re all depraved
Why Saddam and DeSade both gave the place raves!
Welcome to the Abu Ghraib Hotel
It even beats Guantanamo Bay!
Welcome to the Abu Ghraib Hotel…and Spa!



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